Sorry I’ve been absent for an extended stretch again. The warmer weather vaulted the Architect and me out of our winter hibernation and back into the renovation gig. He fixed our front door–which could have been kicked in by a toddler–and I tore down plaster and walls. I found two more dead rats–one mummified, one just a skeleton. I stepped on another nail. This time it really hurt. But, I don’t seem to have lockjaw, which is nice. The big upside is that my prison of an office is now part of the openness of the rest of the upstairs floor plan and I don’t feel anywhere near as confined sitting here writing as I did before. And it’s nowhere near as frigid in here.
I just got news this morning that while I did make it to the second elimination round, I did not make it to the quarterfinals in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award. I was really hoping to make it to the quarterfinals. Well, hoping for the part of the quarterfinals where Publishers Weekly would read my entire novel and review it. I wanted the awfulness that would undoubtedly go along with such a “win” because I wanted some brutal professional feedback by the biggest publication news source on the planet. I wanted to know whether or not to shove “Resonance” in a drawer and forget her. I wanted someone to tell me, instead of having to figure it out myself. Guess that’s what I get for trying to insert divine intervention into a free will universe. Still, I’ll be getting two reviews of my opening pages given by the Amazon Vine Reviewers who essentially knocked me out of the competition. Two opinions of why my book didn’t work for them. That should be fairly helpful. And making it from roughly ten-thousand people to two-thousand on the strength of my pitch means–fucking finally–I don’t have to stress over that thing anymore. It apparently does its job. Now I just need my novel to do the same.
It’s funny how I don’t feel defeated, resigned, or even belligerent. I feel just as determined as I did before, just as calm, just as focused. Have I finally reached that spot of firm belief in my work? Or is this just the first stage of rowing a big barge down a river in Egypt? I don’t know. It’s going to take a couple of weeks for those reviews to trickle down to me, so I’m going to just keep on keepin’ on and forget all about “Resonance” for a while and push ahead with the new novel.
Hell and Wheels 
March 19th, 2009 at 2:57 pm
Laughingwolf — Thanks. I hadn’t heard about Travis. That’s fantastic! I hope he goes all the way to twenty-five grand.As far as the renovation goes, we’re at least getting out of the really messy, bulky stuff and getting into the more detail work. That’s a relief.
March 19th, 2009 at 1:36 am
grats on getting that far, av :)travis got to the quarters, as you may knowglad you’re making progress on the reno, will feel so much better when done… though it never is :O lol
March 19th, 2009 at 12:23 am
Steve-O — Well, since the opening pages failed to get me propelled ahead in the contest, try to be even-minded about them. I think I’ll be hitting them with an axe sometime soon.Dude, you make me blush. But I like it. ; )
March 18th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
Perhaps this week I’ll break down and print out Resonance. My eyes couldn’t take the refresh-rate on my laptop’s screen, and I still can’t afford a Sony e-reader!And I’m glad you’re staying calm and focused: you’ve got a shitload of talent, and your energy is better served developing it with new work. You rock, Av!!
March 18th, 2009 at 3:04 pm
Thanks, Sidney. I feel pretty good about it. I, too, hope I get what I want out of my reviews. Might just be what I need to change the tide of rejections to acceptance.
March 18th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
From 10,000 to 2,000 is fabulous. Hope the reviews are helpful and meaningful.
March 18th, 2009 at 2:34 am
I’m very keen on reading those reviews. I think it will give me a great starting point on where I can improve.I didn’t expect to go much further, so I’m not upset at all. In all, I’m fairly happy with the outcome.
March 17th, 2009 at 4:09 pm
It’ll be interesting to get those reviews and see what factors they focused on. I’m sorry you didn’t make it further but from my understanding there was a huge number of entries. and there could be all kinds of factors, including genre etc involved.